It's hard to start over

A couple years ago I blogged about the "comfort zone." The place we all find ourselves at some point in time.  This blog encompasses the same idea. Starting over is hard. Whether it be in a new job, a new relationship, a new hobby.  It takes a lot of courage to start from scratch. 

I like my job a lot, but even if I didn't it would be hard for me to change careers.  You spend so much time becoming skilled in one thing it seems like you've gone too far along to change.  We're all told that your 20's are the time to change jobs, to take chances. But no one mentions the cost of a cable bill, groceries, drinks, Dunkin Donuts.  It's easier said than done.

It's even hard to start a new hobby. I've still never ice skated, never played golf, never snowboarded. Not necessarily because I'm not interested, but because I don't want to fail. I want to stick with what I know I'm good at.

Relationships are probably the best example of how hard it is to start over. We invest so much time with another person.  So many memories are created. Photos are posted on Facebook. Common friends are made. Families are formed.  Sometimes it seems people stay with each other out of comfort rather than love.

I guess starting over is so hard because we are, at the core, creatures of habit.  Though we all have different priorities, most follow the same general routine. We all brush our teeth , go to work or school, and go to sleep.  But is that such a bad thing? Is it so bad being comfortable? Maybe not. Maybe a so called boring life is a good thing. What do you think?

How do douchebags not realize it?

I've always been fascinated by douchebags. The definition of douchebag according to Wikipedia is "a person, usually male, with a variety of negative qualities, specifically arrogance and engaging in obnoxious and/or irritating actions, most often without malicious intent. Who writes these Wikipedia entries anyway?

For me it's simply a person that is just not chill. I don't get how people don't realize they are douchebags. The lack of self awareness in people is pretty shocking.

Douchebags can take on many different faces. The number one sign you are a douche is arrogance. Usually these people actually have very low self esteem so overcompensate and try to act like they are the shit. These people are the worst. The second is loudness. Okay, some people can't help it, but don't you hate that dude at the bar that just screams and shouts about everything. It's all about attention. That is what these people want.

The third is maintenance. If you spend 45 minutes gelling your hair and spraying cologne all of over yourself you probably are a douche. Also, people that lie about how much action they get are douches. If you have to lie about that stuff the chances are you barely get any.  Even if you do its from a girl that likes douche bags so there's nothing to brag about. Though I will say some girls seem to really be attracted to the douchebag race but that is for another blog.

Anyone who pops their collar is usually a douche. I know that is generic to say but why do people actually do that? Don't give me the BS excuse that you didn't know you were doing it. It takes effort to pop a collar. In my opinion, the reason is for attention and to get girls. That's another thing, anytime a person sacrifices who they are to attract a girl it is being a douche. Look, we all want to look good in front of the ladies, but don't sell your soul. Girls can usually pick up on this anyway.

I always wonder how people like this can wake up in the morning and not realize they are a douche. Do they just not care? What goes on in their head? It's truly amazing to me how many of these people populate the world. I wonder if it is something in a person's DNA or just how they are raised or maybe just who they surround themselves with. Is this something that can be cured? The sad thing is douchebags usually don't know even know they have the disease. There are probably a few douche's reading this article. Please feel free to comment.

Things I don't like

Life is awesome for the most part. There are a lot of terrible things going in the world, but at the end of the day I still get to listen to 2pac and Phil Collins and watch the Celtics.  However, some things I really dislike. Hate is a strong word and there is too much of it in this world already. But these things below, as the great Peter Griffin would say, "really grind my gears."

People who can't merge: This happens everyday on my way home on 66.  Without fail at least one idiot driver will totally disregard all the signs, and the fact that they are somehow the only car driving in the farthest left lane. Then they will swerve in at the last second causing traffic to be backed up. If you don't know how to merge correctly stay off the roads or move to Nebraska where there is so merging.

People at work who put everything on speaker phone: I can't go into specifics here, but seriously why can't you at least close the door when you are on speaker? Why do we need to hear everything you say? This isn't even for conference calls either. Some people put their hairstylist on speaker. Unless you have some kind of hearing problem show some respect for those around you. It's just amazing how many people in this world are oblivious to common decency. Also, put your damn cell phone on vibrate. I don't need to hear the latest Kesha hit from your cell phone 4 times a day.

Ryan Seacrest: One of my rules is to not hate people I don't know. However, I almost have to break this rule for Ryan Seacrest. Look, the guy is more successful than I will ever be, but there is a 0 percent chance he is a genuine human being and would be chill to hang out with.  It is sad we will be bringing in the New Year with him for the next 50 years. By the way, I love Dick Clark but take him off the air. It is ruining his legacy.

The New York Jets, Los Angeles Lakers, and Duke: I hate all these teams. The order depends on the season. Notice I said hate here because we are talking about a team rather than a person. I think it's fine to hate a team but not an individual.  Anyway, the Jets suck at life. Sure, they beat the Patriots, but with people like Cromartie and Bart Scott how do Jets fans sleep at night? I used to hate Rex Ryan but his wife does foot fetish videos so I almost feel bad for him.. The Lakers? Let's just say without being gift wrapped Pau, Kobe would still have 3 rings. Is he a great player? Yes. Is he Michael Jordan? That's like saying is Lil Wayne, 2pac. It's just foolish. As for Duke, well they are Duke. I have no real reason to hate them besides the fact that I'm a UNC fan which yes makes me a sports hater. We all are in some ways whether you want to admit it or not.

711 Hot Dogs: You may think I love 711 Hot Dogs but the reality is I hate them with all my heart. I hope the inventor of the 711 Hot Dog did not live a good life.  It's a terrible addiction that I hope to break completely someday. There is nothing worse for you in the world besides maybe Taco Bell.

The term FML: One of my biggest pet peeves is people who complain about meaningless stuff. FML, my coffee wasn't hot enough. FML my hair dryer broke. There are people starving in Africa. Shut up and gain some perspective. The fact that you are posting on Facebook means you have a computer which means you are probably more fortunate than 95% of the world.

Reality TV: I know,  this must mean I'm a hater right? No, the reason I watch TV is to get away from reality. I don't want to watch stuff I could do on my own. I could bring some of my friends in on a Friday night and be more entertaining than 90 percent of these reality shows. It's not the reality shows fault, it's the consumers for being too bored with their lives that they have to watch others. I miss the days of Fresh Prince of Bel Air and Step by Step.

Modern Music: There is some good stuff out there, and it is better than it was 5 years ago. but the stuff on the "hit" music stations is pretty much crap.  Kesha? Do people seriously like her. I heard a song from her and thought it was a joke but apparently she's the number 1 artist in the country. The only reason these songs are "good" is because of the beats which are made by the producers. The producers are better than ever now because of the technology. Makes me even sadder that 2pac wasn't alive now. Who knows the amazing stuff he could've done(tear).

People that like to hate stuff for no apparent reason: I know, didn't I just write about 10 things I hated? Yes, but I could back each of these up with 15 examples. A lot of people like to hate stuff because something is popular. For example, saying  they hate Leonardo Dicrapio in the Titanic. Really, well why? The guy played his role perfectly and if you didn't shed a tear when Kate let him go at the end you probably don't have a soul.   Or Facebook is so lame? Really, actually Facebook is freaking awesome and is one of the best inventions of the last decade. How else would I post my Beer Pong Tournament invites?

At the end of the day life is awesome but you can't like stuff without disliking stuff too. That's life in a nutshell.

Things I love

A lot of people like to hate stuff in life.  I'm not sure why they are so angry, but obviously they must not listen to enough Phil Collins or do enough kayaking.  Anyway, I thought I'd write a few things about stuff I like. The world is a messed up place but it's important to remember that all in all life can be pretty great.

Kayaking on the Potomac: Everyone should have a place in life they can go to relax and contemplate the meaning of life.  For me it is the Potomac River. Sure, the water is dirty,and there are now supposedly Bull Sharks roaming around, but I'll be going kayaking on that river until I'm 97.

Sam Adams Cherry Wheat and Sam Adams White Ale. I love all Sam Adam's beers(except the Chocolate one) but these are the best. If I could have one drink for the rest of my life it would be ice cold lemonade. My second choice, Sam Adams Cherry Wheat though you can really only drink like 3 of those. Sam Adams White Ale is one of the most underrated drinks ever made. It's only out for about 4 weeks in the spring so check it out.  The Blueberry Beer at Boston Beer Works is outstanding as well.

Dunkin Donuts Coffee: My love for Dunkin Donuts is hard to explain in words. If I ever become rich I will buy the franchise. Every Saturday and Sunday morning you can find me at the Cherrydale Dunkin Donuts buying an extra large coffee cream and sugaaa with a sesame bagel. It is like clockwork. Starbucks can suck it.

The Boston Celtics: I like everything about this team and franchise. Larry Bird can walk on water in my book.  The current squad is just so damn likeable. From Big Baby taking charges, to Kevin Garnett scowling at people, to Rajon Rondo being awesome at everything. Frankly not liking Rondo is similar to not liking Santa Clause or not liking free pizza. You are crazy if you don't.  I love them and am so proud to be a fan.

Baths: I always get a strange look when I tell people I take bath's. I don't understand why it is weird. It's relaxing and feels good and there are few things better in life better than drinking a cold beer, with a good book, in the bath tub. It must be one of those things people don't like because they think it's not cool to do it. Just do whatever feels good and who gives a crap.

2pac, Phil Collins, Bob Seger, Rod Stewart, and Tom Petty: An eclectic mix I know, but each one brings something different to the table. I listened to only 2pac for four straight years in high school and while he is still the best music artist ever, these other four are close.  The important thing in life is to love music whether it be crazy emo stuff, country, rap or classical. Music makes everything better. Except Justin Beiber, he doesn't make anything better. Though his song with Ludacris is kind of catchy.

Honest people: I like people that don't beat around the bush. Say what you mean.  Screw manners and tell me the truth to my face. Except if you don't like bald people, then just lie to me.

Office Space: For my money the greatest comedy of all time with Dumb and Dumber and Ace Ventura a close second. This movie is a comedy but also a documentary on office life. Should be required viewing for anyone about to enter the Corporate World.

There are a lot more things I like, but this article is getting Bill Simmons lengthy (love Bill Simmons by the way). The important thing in life is to be passionate about stuff. Don't like stuff, love it. That's what life is all about.

Redhead Pride

"Scotland has the highest percentage of natural redheads, with 13 percent. Ireland is a close second, with 10 percent. Only about 2 percent of people in the United States have naturally red hair."

I talk a lot about being a red head. It's probably annoying but it is part of my identity and frankly if you aren't a red head you just wouldn't understand. Being a red head or "ginger" as some call it is a package deal. You get the hair, the freckles, the sunburns, and the distinction of being the token red head pretty much anywhere you go. The other night I was at a party and two other red heads were there.  It was an incredible scene and made me realize how rare it is to see a red head, an actual red head. No, people with brown hair that turns slightly red in the summer do not count. I hate when people say that almost as much as I hate people that  can't merge correctly on 66. But I digress...

Being a red head wasn't something I was always proud of. As a kid I was called "Carrot Top" or "Red" and was really sensitive about it. Like any other young kid I wanted to fit in. I wanted to have brown hair and brown eyes like everyone else. Now it's different.  Would I like to to be able to go for a run without wearing SPF 80? Sure. By the way, I think the whole SPF think is BS. As long as you're wearing SPF 25 or higher and reapply a few times it doesn't matter what you buy. It's like buying a diet Coke with a quarter pound cheeseburger and fries. Same result, different name.

Being a red head means only getting a "tan" when your freckles come together after a long day in the sun or in a dark bar. It means wearing sun block when it's raining. It means being "the red head" anywhere you go. But you need to embrace it. I always joke that red heads are their own race, but in a way we are our own people.  I can go a whole week without seeing a Ginger.  By the way I don't think red heads should be allowed to go bald. Why give us the hair if we are just going to lose it? Genetics suck sometimes.

People need to embrace what makes them different. Everyone has something that separates themselves from someone else. Whether it be personality, interests, talents, looks, etc. embrace your uniqueness because being average just leaves you as another number.

Live life by your own rules

Anytime someone asks me how I'm doing I usually say, "Living the dream." Most people think it's a joke, and in a way it is. My life's pretty average when it comes down to it. But at the end of the day I have the freedom to do what I want, so in that respect I am living the dream, or at least my dream at this stage in my life.

I feel like people are in a rush to do everything.  People feel the need to be married by this age, kids by this age. They need a certain job, car, house or they won't be successful. Whatever happened to appreciating the little moments?  People get so caught up in getting all the big things done they forget to appreciate what comes along the way.

You have your whole life to start a family, but how much time do you have to do whatever you want with no responsibilites?   Not very long when you think about it. Also, why do you only have a certain amount of time to do things? I feel like if the norm wasn't to get married and have kids by a certain age people wouldn't do it. Not that there is anything wrong with either of those. In fact, I would like both someday. It just needs to be for the right reasons.

It's almost like these societal milestones are a chore sometimes. I better live it up in my 20's cause in my 30's I have to settle down.  Why? Why not just let it happen when it happens? Go out and meet new people, join an Alumni softball team, go to a network event for work. Get out of your comfort zone and stop worrying about what you're supposed to do.  Realize what you're ready for at this stage in your life. If you're ready to settle down then do it. If not, then don't. That's the beauty of America, you can do what you want. I think sometimes we forget that.  Life's too short to just resign yourself to a certain fate. Get out there and make your own dream.

We all love music

Have you ever met someone that doesn't like music? I didn't think so.  Whether it be rock, rap, country, bluegrass or even that screaming stuff I think they call Emo, we all love it.  Music serves a number of functions.  It can help us smile during our worst days or make us laugh or cry with one verse or tune. Anytime I've had a bad day I put on some 2pac, Phil Collins, or Rod Stewart and everything goes away.  The power of music truly is unbelievable.

Music takes us back to moments in life and places we've been. It reminds us of former boyfriends and girlfriends. Anyone who has been in a relationship has 1 or 2 songs they will always associate with that person. It takes us back to seemingly meaningless moments in time that are made meaningful by one song.  In truth, it hits the soul.  Music can also bring people together like few other things in life can.  It can pump us up for a big game, or mellow us out after a day at work.  We laugh, we cry, we sing along.

I still remember listening to "Learning to Fly" on my way to college graduation. I still remember the songs I listened to during the best and worst times of former relationships. Whenever I hear oldies I think back to the days playing Parcheesee with my dad when I was a kid.  I still remember the first time I heard 2pac and where I was.  In short, music makes us remember, and in the end that is what life is all about.