Thursday, October 6, 2011

The Notebook- Does Love Like That Exist?

This is a follow up to my friend Sarah Sheldon's incredible story of how her grandparents met, fell in love, and stayed in love until their last day's . Please read this at it is much more powerful than anything I could ever hope to write.

"So it's not gonna be easy. It's gonna be really hard. We're gonna have to work at this every day, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, for ever, you and me, every day." -The Notebook

I love "chick flicks" and I am happy to admit it. In fact, I don't understand why more guys don't like them or rather don't admit they do. Don't you go to the movies to feel happy? I do. That is what these movies do. But I digress....

Tuesday night I watched the Notebook for the first time in years. For anyone who hasn't seen it I won't go into details on the storyline, but it is basically the best love story ever this side of Love Actually. As I was watching the story of Allie and Noah I got to thinking, could this happen in today's world? Does the true love they had for each other still exist? Or has it ever existed? The answer to both of these questions is; Absolutely.

Let's talk about love for a second. Love makes no sense. The people that look best for us on paper often turn out to be totally wrong for us in the end. I've always thought my dream girl would be a 2pac loving, kayaker, that plays basketball and likes Dunkin Donuts, but we probably wouldn't get along. Chemistry is not something that can be explained, it just happens.

I disagree with the old adage that there is one person for everyone. That's simply not true. At the same time there probably are only about 100 people in the world that you truly belong with. Only a lucky few of us ever meet that one person, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't stop looking.

Back in the day there were less options. There were no phones or emails to communicate in between dates. You had your time with the girl or guy and then had to wait until the next time you saw them to continue  your courtship.  Yes, technology has changed love, but it hasn't changed its inner core. Sure, you can text, email, skype, and whatever else kids do these days, but you actually have to be with that person for love to grow. 

The culture of love has changed a lot as well. The divorce rate is 50% with another 20% probably only staying with each other out of comfort. With online dating people from all over the world can now get together. People are marrying at a later age and some choose not even to get married. We have grown into more of an independent culture, which is in itself is a good thing. However, where does that leave true love?

I've never felt about anyone like Noah felt for Allie, but I do believe she's out there. I think love conquers all. Life is unpredictable. You have bad days and good days. But if you find love nothing else really matters. If at the end of the day you can go home to your Allie or Noah everything is okay in this world. We should all strive for this kind of love because all of us deserve it. Remember, you never know when you'll meet that one person that you can't live without.


  1. This kind of love does exist. And the good news is it is everything you could ever imagine how the two characters feel. The Notebook, as cheesy as it is, is the second most truthful movie about true love. The first being, as much as people like to hate on the new one, the Great Gatsby. That movie is essentially my life.. With a lot less glitter and mansions. I cried when i watched the remake for the first time.. Because it is exactly, to a TEE, how true love is. That feeling of hope and adrenaline is not anything anyone could ever fake. It's the literal sense of living in a fairytale. But this isn't all sunshine and smiles..
    I know because i am awake at 2:30 AM, three years later, crying. When that kind of love isn't reciprocated... You don't even care if you never date anyone else or marry. You want them or nothing. So being single forever is a better option than faking it with some poor person. I love my Jane Doe. She was my green harbor light in a bleak world. My everything.
    And sometimes, it should not be something you wish upon yourself.

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  3. I absolutely think so. Unfortunately though, not every soul mate is meant to stay. Sometimes they come as a "lesson" to teach you something, to hold up a mirror for you and to show you what unconditional love means. Or sometimes too, if lucky enough, they are meant to stay. It all depends on the couple in my opinion. Each soulmate relationship is unique and different. And they each come into your life for a different reason then maybe your sister's soulmate, neighbor's, best friend's, etc.

  4. I just watched this movie after years of seeing it the first time. After bawling my eyes out & feeling sorry for myself because I thought I had that love, I truly don't think it exists like that. People now are too involved themselves & how they feel. When they're bored they move on to the next best thing. I thought I found my "Noah". He was amazing & came into my life like a ball of fire. Changing everything & knew & felt about the world. I was happy. For the first time in my life I was truly & deliriously happy. The first year was bliss. Then he deployed & my happy romance started to disintegrate. I tried everything I could to keep our love alive & for us to be connected. After he received orders to Italy & us coming to a mutual agreement that I'd stay in my career I moved across the ocean to be closer only to find out that he didn't want me anymore. He didn't know when he "had lost sight in our marriage & he was so sorry". I know what is real... the pain that you feel when the person you promised your heart & soul to breaks you. That pain that never ends & steals your breath. That is real.